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5.18.02 5:51 AM |
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5.09.02 8:19 PM |
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4.26.02 8:40 AM actually, no, i don't have many friends as it is. let's move on... i've had the phrase 'a rare symphony' in my head for a couple weeks now. i have this feeling i've lifted it from some place, but nothing comes up on google or rings a bell otherwise. i'll give it another week or so before slapping it on as a song title for one of the many songs i've done which i've given equally random, but less thought out, names to. i think "fight club" finally cracked the top 10 for me. i so rarely watch movies from front to back, as most movies are like pop music, quite disposable. as in my music, my tastes generally gravitate toward the more cerebral, the stuff that travels the road less taken[/frost]. i like films about guys who go to foreign countries to fornicate with the women in hopes of lowering the number of children born in that country of full domestic blood. or shit like War Games. thanks to the miracle of digital cable and cinemax's 314 different channels, fight club has been airing on one of two channels almost every other night this month. as much as i love the movie (i had to go back and change this, for some reason i typed "as much as i love the money"...if i was gainfully employed i'd consider that a freudian slip), i must cover something here that keeps skipping around in the ol' cranium when i watch the movie...in most movies, there's a scene i like to call the "sell scene." in "chasing amy," it's where affleck and adams are in the rain, and she comes running back to kiss him (if i've just ruined the movie for you, you deserve it, you should have already seen the thing by now...shawn's in it, for god's sake!!). in "american beauty," it's the bag scene. i think. at least that's what it was for me. anyway, this is the scene that magnifies your feelings on a movie. if a movie has emotionally hooked you, one way or another, and it sells itself in the sell scene, you love it. if it hooks you, and it doesn't sell you, like if you thought the bag scene was retarded and the people were these overly introspective crackaz, you'll get bothered by the movie, much like i am now with weezer. now, for fight club...the movie's ridiculously good, if you buy it. however, there's no real sell scene. there's the part where it all becomes clear to the main character, but everything that leads up to that really leads into that moment. the problem, in my eyes, is that for the whole "you're the same person" bit to work, a little respect must be given to the viewer. we are to assume everything leading up to norton's character's realization happened as we saw it, that he was somehow fighting himself. how did the bags of fat get over the fence? if they were thrown, the bags would have opened. just, little shit like that. the movie tried to sell all those moments where norton/pitt were interacting as there being only one person involved. i've learned to appreciate the movie for the multitude of excellent lines, the killer cinematography, ed fuckin norton (when will this man get recognized for how great an actor he is?), and the attention to detail (single/double character confusion aside). i can't help but remain bothered by the small holes created when the big plot development is unveiled...after all, if you have a great steak (plot twist) you're going to try and sell me, you should at least sell me on the home fries (the two-person scenes that are, in the movie's reality, one-person scenes) first. okay. this is why i express myself better in the printed word, because when i try to vocalize this it always comes out something like "no, it's shit, you just can't fucking do that, too many things don't....fit....it's just...you know what i mean." end result? despite my frustration with the plot it's still in my top 10, somewhere around orgazmo, whatever kevin smith film i've most recently seen, american beauty, and the first half of full metal jacket. one of my favorite months of the year is just around the corner. despite the traditional reasons which make it a Brad's Pick, i have concerts by both Sparta (5/2) and The John Butler Trio (5/12) on the horizon. the traditional reasons i speak of are, of course, SWEEPS MONTH! i assume you fer'ners out there have sweeps, but in case you don't or are slow like kids they have telethons for, it's where the tv channels, both network and (to a lesser extent) cable, whore themselves out as much as possible for big ratings, which translate to an adjustment in advertisment rates until the next sweeps month, which (if i'm not mistaken) is in october or november. this is when your local news stations start running stories like "what community in this city has the most registered sex offenders? is it YOUR'S? tune in monday at five to find out." i wish i could say i made that one up, but a local channel is running that one. it's being run before may, but it's coming soon, technically at the beginning of sweeps, which are on 4/28 if i'm not mistaken. in years past it's been such journalistic dynamite as "how germ-filled are the hotels YOU stay at?" or "think you have privacy in your own home? find out who could be watching YOUR family, thursday at six-thirty." hopefully american sympathizer barbara-lee edwards of KFMB (channel number 8 on your remote, number 1 in your heart - i just made that up) will file a story on "canadians who move down to san diego for an anchor position and start wearing little american flag pins on their lapel even though their co-workers make it abundantly clear they're canucks by making a hoser joke at their expense whenever they talk about snow or hockey or syrup (which is more often than you'd think, believe me)." i suppose it's okay to wear a pin of old glory, just seems a little...odd. i'll excuse her for now though, cause she's pretty hot. for a canadian. those wizards in makeup discovered her colors were blues and greens, not reds. didn't hurt that they changed their set from predominantly red colors to blue either. all i know is that with sweeps month, the real winners are the viewers, because we get the most absoludicrous stories on the most asinine subjects. you can almost see the integrity melt off the young journalists' faces. i'd say the same for the older journalists, but like mtv and menudo, old people really aren't allowed on network television. they've let a few old dinosaurs wander around the weekend morning telecasts, and i think there's a geezer with a bowtie that does the weather on one station (he could have retired/died a while ago, i don't watch that channel for news...too many old people), but other than that it's like a tryout for "YMCA Junior Reporter 2002" whenever i flip around. there is a big downside to sweeps this time around, and it brings me to my next subject, one that will occupy my time further in the coming months. i'll just say now, that you heard me say it here first, so when i come back to it i can say "i told you a few months ago this would happen." you'll remember that twat who raped and killed that girl here a few months back? david westerfield? anyway, he's gonna be going on trial here on may 17th, barring any delays. unfortunately, that means every local channel will cover the trial like a security camera on winona rider at a prada sale. as far as i know, cameras will be allowed in the courtroom during the trial. if they aren't, good. if they aren't, you won't be hearing from me on this aspect of the trial in a few weeks. i'll just have to find other stuff to comment on, and no less wittily at that. now, if they do allow cameras, my precious The Price Is Right will be preempted. you might as well take my morning caffeine rush away from me, cause nothing gets me going quite like a dumb broad from UC Davis or Chico bidding $250 on a grandfather clock AFTER consulting her group of equally dense friends in the audience. that's bested only by the young guy who's there with his buddies, and tries to get all strategic on his fellow contestants by bidding one dollar more than the person before him. unfortunately, he's only the second person to bid, and he gets boxed in by at least one of the next two bidders. that forces the question, who's the bigger tard? the guy, bidding second, who bests the first bid by a buck? or the third bidder who does the exact same thing with one bidder left (essentially sealing the round for the last bidder)? my friends, it's things like that which get me through the day. if the trial preempts TPiR, (watch me tie this all together...watch...WATCH, DAMNIT!), every local channel is going to carry as much westerfield-related news as possible. after all, the Insane Logic of News Directors (it's frequent enough to earn capitalization) means that when 5 other channels are carrying something, you must also carry it, so as not to watch your viewers gravitate over to one of the other choices. no channel is willing to grow the deuce and keep their regular programming, which shits me to no end. after all, someone's got to carry the thing. each channel wants to be the "channel you can turn to for in-depth trial coverage"...'gavel to gavel' is the phrase they use, if i'm not mistaken. in may, unfortunately, no channel is willing to stray from the expected norm, for fear their ratings drop like a jockey off a freshly-gelded horse. sweeps, that two-headed bitch-maiden. i have kYOUsi's morning news on in the background, and they just ran a story by entertainment reporter ted dawson. i've reported on dawson's follies before, so i'll gloss over it for now. it's a well that doesn't appear to be running dry any time soon. what i was curious about, rather, was how someone lands such a cushy gig. you get to go out each evening with a cameraman to places like concerts, charity fundraisers, awards banquets, and other places where people get drunk and say things to people they barely know. dawson does a 20-second interview here, an opening and closing bit back to the newsroom, a bit of the friendlies with the bobbing heads at the desk, and his night is done. home to pop a quaalude, feed the dog, make sure the patio door is locked, and upstairs to drop it in the wifey for eight minutes before complaining of a bad back, and quietly going to sleep. after all, she'll get up early in the morning for her job, and you won't have to talk to her about your sexual inadequacies until later that evening, when she gets home from work...twenty minutes before you head on out to the wild animal park for a tribute to joan embry, the opening of a new exhibit at the latino american empowerment museum, and a concert at the belly up tavern by "alternative rock group" black eyed peas. yes, dawson's that bad with musical descriptions. seriously though, people, how does one get such a gig? the people who usually hold these spots are goofy shits with no actual journalistic talent, so i imagine they move up from traffic reporter on news radio, to that guy who just gets a tiny headshot in the corner on tv with the city's traffic map taking up the other 95% of the screen. they usually have the worst names too, like Todd Gripper, or Susy Ann Wild, or a black guy named Rodney Black. or C.S. Keys. (note to self: local humor alienates the readers) five days left here. that's something. as usual, someone else can put it better than i can... strung out on the future burnt out on the past sometimes i'd rather burn this place right to the ground another day in this place so small, i'd rather be somebody else maybe if my mind wasn't so tall, i wouldn't be able to tell there was a time when i could say it right to you that i was never going to leave this place but now its "i was wrong" and "i don't wanna fucking talk about it" cause it feels like things have changed yeah well i could talk, talk, talk and say i'm wrong, wrong, wrong but i feel i'm in a place i've never known and it feels like there's something wrong, something wrong, something wrong and i know that i don't wanna know... burning out from all the minor misconceptions that just play on your frustrations your self doubt has your head so turned around you know that something that keeps me sane and i can't explain why it's all i have left to hold on to and when i say that it's everything from my highest hopes to my dumbest schemes you'll never know what it means to me. toodles, kiddies! -b Now Playing: Zwan - Baby Let's Rock (4.7.02) Quote Of The Day: (An exchange between a reporter and a police official at a press conference this morning) Dave Cohen: The parents of the child are staying at a motel today while we conduct the investigation. (not TWO FUCKING SECONDS later) Bridget Naso: While you're conducting the investigation, where will the parents of the child be staying if they're not at their home now? Running red lights at photo-enforced intersections, The Sidewalk Crusaders Network: Dre's Page Email me. wattershed@rocketmail.com |
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4.24.02 10:09 PM |
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4.18.02 11:23 PM |